PSA for Single Gals Everywhere (maybe a few married ones, too)

With the terrific and terrifying “V Day” upon us later this week (and you can take your pick as to which category it falls into), I thought it appropriate to highlight the book I just finished reading: Manslations: Decoding the Secret Language of Men. Manslations is written by none other than fellow blogger/comedian/actor and all around good (but admits to occasionally having done some of the same doofy guy things he writes about) guy, The Manslator, Jeff Mac.

What I like about Jeff’s book — and Jeff — is his humor and honesty in everything he writes. His Golden Rule and its supporting points to understanding the man/men you’re dating and/or with long-term are straightforward and effective. I mean, if I had actually followed the Golden Rule of “Whenever there is a conflict between what a man says and what he does, always, always ignore what he says,” I would have saved myself so much heartbreak over the years. So much agonizing over what “it” all means. So much friggin’ wasted time pining over men who really just weren’t into our relationship (or me) as much as they claimed to be.

And, let me tell you, as a hopeful, honest person with a big heart, I wanted so much to believe what they said. (Ooh – and I’ve heard some sweet talk.) So much so that I overlooked practically every behavioral clue smacking me in the face.

Hello??????

Sigh.

While there are elements similar to the book, He’s Just Not That Into You, which I’ve also read, Jeff manslates into broader areas: from debunking common myths about the way most men think, to securing, prepping and debriefing a first date, to understanding how to approach men for serious talks, to gift giving and surviving the holidays with your man, to why the heck your significant other is still obsessed with shooting zombies at the age of [INSERT ANY AGE OVER 15 HERE].

Let me pause here and note that I spent a recent Saturday night watching college hoops with FlyBoy and his guy friends, and THEN was introduced to the zombie-shooting game of Left4Dead. And…I liked it. I believe this might lead to my induction into “The Best Girlfriend Ever” Hall of Fame. Thank you.

Anyhoo, for a peak into Jeff’s humor and style, take a look at how he helped me — yes, me! — manslate if men are initimated by women who can hold their own (note my awesome biceps in the photo) and what it means when men express their feelings to a woman…or, in my case, why men seemed to like to dump their crazy shit on me.

Oh, and then do yourself and the women you love a favor — buy the book.

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Your Buddhalicious Nearest Book

Buddha@Hong Kong
Buddha@Hong Kong, originally uploaded by hk_traveller.
Elizabeth at Love, Elizabeth tagged me for this — it’s a good one and easy! Here are the rules:
  1. Pick up the nearest book.
  2. Open to page 123.
  3. Locate the fifth sentence.
  4. Post the next three sentences on your blog and in so doing…
  5. Tag five people, and acknowledge who tagged me.

When I saw Elizabeth’s selection (one of my favorite books, Pride & Prejudice) I was at work and the closest book was a dictionary. I decided to wait until I got home and here I am.

…Reaching for the bookshelf… Aha!

I bought the book If the Buddha Dated by Charlotte Kasl about two years ago. As you may have gathered by now, I can be fairly philosophical about life and love (but not so much about laundry, as in my blog’s tagline — I mean how much does one need to ponder the meaning in a pile of Power Rangers underwear?). Anyway, as the title implies, the book is about dating and finding intimate relationships along the spiritual path — and finding peace within yourself even if it’s not your time to be with someone. It’s a little hokey pokey in a few places, but really rather good overall. I especially like this part, which has nothing to do with the meme, but I’ll share it with you anyway:

“Each person has a story to tell. Some of the chapters are heroic. Some of them are about loss, some about fear, some about achievement or joy, just like my story… When you say good-bye to someone or decide not to see them again, remember you are a moment in their story. Make it a story that doesn’t leave a scar.”

Cool, right? So I turn to Page 123 and follow the instructions above. I notice the title of this section is “When the Buddha Makes Love.”

Oh, my. I’m not sure I signed up for this. When Jeff Mac writes about something embarrassing on his blog, Manslations, he’ll joke that he’s faint of heart because he’s from Connecticut. Well, Jeffrey, I’m from the friggin’ midwest!

I digress. Here’s what I’m supposed to quote:

“…At a spiritual level, making love is an experience of the shared heart that flourishes alongside honesty, love, and commitment. It flows from knowing each other well and desiring to dissolve into the heart and body of each other. It can’t be learned through a how-to manual, or instruction book, because it uniquely reflects all of who you are.”

Well, that wasn’t so bad — no talk of the Big O until further down the page (and we ain’t talking Oprah, honey). Those sentences are spot on, don’t you think?

Wait, I didn’t mean…uh…

I’m putting the book back right now.

I’m going to try something different here because I don’t follow directions well. Instead of tagging people, why don’t you leave me a comment with your 3 sentences from the book nearest to you? (And if you have a blog, feel free to post it, too!)

Please no Kama Sutra if you can help it. I’m not sure my heart can take it. Or just send it to me separately. 😉

This Friday’s Public Service Announcement

I took off of work yesterday and am at home again today. Over on the kitchen table is a roll of gray-silver duct tape, aluminum foil, scissors, tape, a bag and flexible aluminum dryer ducting. Over here at my desk I am surfing through my favorite blogs. In other words: I am procrastinating making T-Rex’s robot costume, which I need to have ready this afternoon for a Halloween parade.

So, while the duct tape is there, I am here, and you are God knows where, let me call your attention to two of my favorite procrastinating blogs. They are sure to make you feel better on this gray, rainy October day. Well, maybe your October day isn’t gray or rainy and maybe you forgot it’s October – whatever, just read them:

GO FUG YOURSELF

I recently discovered this link through Madame Queen’s site. GFY is dedicated to the relentless pursuit of making fun of celebrity fashion. As one raised on People and Entertainment Tonight — and who will admit to the masses that I watch E! on a semi-regular basis — this site is a hoot, the writing by the mysterious GFY ladies, hilarious. For example, this post, this one and this one, too, had me snorting when I read them. And that was only covering 2 days in celebrity-land. Who knows what’s in those archives?!

MANSLATIONS

Speaking of fashion and the latest accessories, ladies, you must get yourself over to Manslations because Jeff Mac is the new black. Or brown, since brown is the new black, but it doesn’t rhyme with Mac — or is it navy, not brown, this year? Anyway, Mr. Mac is a talented writer and comedian who graciously interprets male behavior for all of womankind, giving us a peek inside the male mind.

What? Why are you laughing?

Yeah, I admit I thought the male mind was a cavern of emptiness, too. Regardless, Jeff’s writing is very funny and I’ve (sometimes begrudgingly) learned a few things that I might retain or even put into practice. MAYBE, Jeff, maybe. Don’t go getting a big fat head over there.

To my male readers, I urge you to visit his site. Jeff is constantly – CONSTANTLY – apologizing for your collective dufus behavior, so give him his props.

BTW, Jeff answered one of my questions and called me a bad ass — in the best sense of the term, or so he says. For that I love him… just not in a psychotic way. Really, Jeff.

And, no, my biceps do not look like that. I wish.

Okay, back to the aluminum foil on the kitchen table. Will check in later. Happy Friday!