Can you believe it’s November already? November always seems to be one of the busier months in our house and this year is no exception. It also happens to be the month in which many bloggers and writers participate in two national pain-inducing writing challenges: NaNoWriMo and NaBloPoMo. NaNoWriMo encourages participants to write 50,000 words towards the first draft of a new novel, while NaBloPoMo sets one blog post each day as the target for bloggers. Their popularity increases every year, and every September I think, “yeah! I’m going to do it!” But every November I bail on the idea. Why?
Because November is NaSuChoMo – National Sucky Choice Month!
Seriously, I applaud all of you who are taking part in one or both of these life-changing experiences, but I can’t.
“Why not, Susan? Are you a LoMo?” (Loser MoMo – btw, I really enjoy calling people “mo-mos” it’s fun to say, don’t you think? NoNo?) Oh, I’ll tell you, my pretties – by sharing my:
Top 10 Reasons It’s SuNoNoMuWriMo
(Susan’s November of Not Much Writing Month)
10. First, let’s start with the most basic rationale: it’s November 3rd! And the day is almost over! I’ve already blown the daily blogging challenge, and unless I engage in magical thinking and get started, like, NOW and forsake all my duties as an employee, mother, daughter, friend, girlfriend and human being with good hygiene and pink unicorns grow extra thick coats because hell hath frozen over, there is no way I will churn out 50K words by the end of the month.
9. After a 72-hour post-Halloween sugar high my energy has plummeted to very, very low levels. Like making me want to break into Swing Low Sweet Chariot (a.k.a. SwiLoSweeCho). I guess scarfing down 5 pounds of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups from your kids’ candy stash while they’re sleeping can be counterproductive.
8. Tomorrow night I will be too busy either crying tears of joy or tears of sorrow to write. My vote is for tears of joy (read: SaPaGoBacLa – Sarah Palin Go Back to ‘laska). Well, I may be up for helping Joe the Plumber rewrite his resume.
7. I’m going to San Diego and SoCal for a week’s vacation with FlyBoy before Thanksgiving! Yes, friends, a WEEK! Seven days of my first real, no-kids/relatives vacation in over 8 years — yowsa! Of course, I’ve been on long weekend trips with my girlfriends, but going away with the man I love? (Oops, did I SpiLoBeO – spill the love beans, oh-no?!) And, no, I’m not bringing my laptop so I can blog about it.
6. Did I mention that I’m taking FlyBoy to see Spamalot a few nights after we return? I’ve seen it once before but can’t wait to see LaLa (Lady in the Lake) singing again. Hilarious — LMAO!
5. Then, the night after that I’m taking my daughter and her friend to see The Cheetah Girls in concert. PaDaTyNo (Pass da Tylenol, please!)
4. The day after that I’ll stuff my face with turkey and all the trimmings.
3. Then, the day after that I’ll roll into work because we’re open that day (BaHuBu! – ba humbug!) to catch up on everything I fell behind on (see #7). Will begin planning how I can postpone Christmas shopping until 2009.
2. By this point I will realize I am exhausted (#s 10-3), deaf (#5), broke (#s7, 6 and 5) and fat (#s9, 7 and 4), making me too depressed to do much of anything.
The number one reason why November is SoNoGoGo:
1. By November 30th I will have realized I SHOULD have blogged every friggin’ day this month because now all I can churn out are silly top 10 lists and acronyms.
Thank you. It was the best I can do. See you in December.
(Just kidding…sort of.)