Spring cleaning

I took the kids to Dick’s Sporting Goods over the weekend to pick up some soccer stuff. (Yep, more magnet ball is coming soon!) While there I noticed an attractive father with his two young daughters. I saw him looking at me a few times. Once or twice he smiled at me.

Wowie wow-wowwas this guy actually checking me out?!

I’m not out looking for attention or dates, and I could see the wedding band on his finger, but it’s nice to think you’re attractive to the opposite sex (or the same sex, or to mannequins, or whatever you like). So I dared to think “yes” — or at least “maybe.”

But then I thought “I hope not” because I had made the mistake of not caring what I wore out in public that day. I had chosen the oldest, most unflattering sweater I owned, which I was showing to all because it was hot in the store and I had taken my coat off. The sweater was clean (that morning) and cute (once upon a time)…but well past its prime. [Insert joke about sweaters looking like their owners after spending too much time together.] My faded jeans and scuffed boots didn’t help, but what the heck, I smiled back.

Minutes later I found myself standing behind the guy and his family in the checkout line. It was then that I saw his wife. It was hard not to notice her: she bore more than a passing resemblance to the lovely Eva Longoria Parker, and was dressed all Hollywood style — or what I imagine to be Hollywood style — in a minidress similar to this and black, shiny, knee-high stiletto boots.

Whoah.

Had I misunderstood the smiles?

Had he been temporarily blinded by the patent leather/synthetic material of her footwear?

Is it appropriate to use the term “patent leather” when describing black, shiny, f-m boots?

Most importantly, while I applaud his wife for looking darn good and taking pride in her style, why in god’s name was she wearing this get-up to Dick’s on a Saturday afternoon… in Western PA… when it was 40 degrees out?

I’ll never know, but I threw the sweater out when I got home.

(Another thing I did was get my daily fix of Go Fug Yourself. It helps to know even the Evas of this world have bad fashion days.)

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9 thoughts on “Spring cleaning

  1. I’m sure you looked “hot” old sweater or not. Maybe he was thinking the same thing you were about his wife and enjoyed looking at a normal woman for a change.

    Congrats on being noticed…it is always flattering.

  2. Congrats on the forbidden eye action!

    Also, just fyi, no guy has ever in the history of the Earth thought to himself, “Wow. She’d be so hot if it wasn’t for those scuffed boots…Ah well, too bad.” Well…no straight man, anyway. So no worries there. You could have been wearing eels duct taped to the soles of your feet and he likely wouldn’t have even seen them.

  3. Heather and Jeff: I’m typically oblivious to attention of any kind, and quite shy and embarrassed about acknowledging it when I do notice. But, hey, next time I may take it to another level and try wearing duct tape on my feet. (I’ll skip the eels, though.) šŸ™‚

  4. He was probably wondering what it would be like to be married to someone that wasn’t so high-maintenance (that is definitely a compliment, btw). Can you imagine having to wait for that woman to get ready every time you want to run somewhere?

  5. I’m with Burgh Baby’s Mom. The guy saw an attractive, low-maintenance woman, and he couldn’t help but smile at her.

    Another drawback of being married to a high-maintenance type: They don’t usually have a sense of humor.

  6. I third what BBM and Terry said. Being with a woman like that seems like it would be very hard work.

    Do you ever notice that the looks that you get seem to come in waves? Like it seems like I’ll go weeks without so much as a glance and then all of sudden all these people will be staring at me so much that I start to think I have something on my face. Weird.

  7. I totally agree with Jane. Besides, its the weekend, you should be wearing something you are comfortable in. I’m all for getting dressed up for a night out, but what you described with that other woman just wouldn’t really be attractive to me.

  8. Burgh Baby’s Mom, Terry, Madame Queen, Jane, and Crazycomputerdad: Thanks for your votes of confidence…although I did throw the sweater out, Jane. If nothing else, it gives me a great excuse to do some spring shopping!

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