This is my life

Being a mother has its rewards, but it also entails a lot of shit people don’t tell you about before you become a parent.

In fact, just a few moments ago T-Rex starts bawling upstairs, calling, “Mom, Mom! Come up here! I have diarrhea. Ew, ew, ew… Help meeeeeeeeee…”

I ignore him and keep typing.

More crying ensues. Finally I respond by yelling upstairs from my seat. (This is a very effective form of communicating with your children.) “What do you want from me? You’re old enough to wipe your own butt.”

Nothing but love in this house, I tell you.


For chrissakes, I think, and go up. I wipe down his almost 6-year-old butt (fortunately there’s low output) while T-Rex milks the hysterics. Not surprisingly, he’s fine! as soon as we’re – I mean, I’m – done. We wash our hands and resume our activities. I go back to typing. I look over and see him dancing around naked wearing his underwear on his head.

Yep. That about sums it up.

Update on 6/12: I’m working from home with the sick boy. I guess it wasn’t a one time thing after all. Cosmic payback for this bad mama.


5 thoughts on “This is my life

  1. At least he tells you when he’s got the runs. My cat Spook leaves a gooey mess outside the litter box — just inches outside of it, every time — and never says a word to me about it.

  2. Cindy, about 15 minutes after I read your comment I heard my son, who had just woken up from a nap, start to whimper downstairs. (I was up in my room at the time.) I run down and see him standing in the kitchen, holding the edge of the table, completely stripped of everything from the waist down. He was upset because he had had an accident in his pants when he woke up, and then proceeded to stand there having more of an accident on the kitchen floor. I felt so bad for him, but was like, “No, no, no! Get in the bathroom!” Again, this is cosmic payback. My mother tells me that every time I would have an upset stomach I would freeze in terror about 3 inches from the bathroom door and yak all over the carpet instead. Every time.

  3. Chris says:

    Susan – tooo funny. I wonder what they do at daycare – call Miss So-and-so to come in? I too, have to stop what I am doing to take care of my 6 year old. The last scream was while we were at the pool (I am in the pool with the other daughter – mind you) with my daugher screaming from the bathroom to come wipe her!!!

  4. Chris, I have no idea what they might do at daycare. I imagine it’s exactly as you said. And I can appreciate and imagine the pool scene! Very funny…when it’s not your kid.

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